Science & Nature Jokes
Nerdy dad jokes for the scientifically inclined. Atoms, molecules, and more.
31 jokes in this category
"A friend of mine said he doesn't understand cloning."
I told him that makes two of us
"Bought a can of fly spray from the supermarket this morning."
Sprayed it all over myself Still can’t fly.
"I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend."
She was always trying to put me in her equation.
"What do you call a snake that's 3.14 meters long?"
A pi-thon.
"Why don't scientists trust stairs?"
Because they're always up to something.
"Why did the gardener plant light bulbs?"
He wanted to grow a power plant.
"Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend?"
He needed more space.
"Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days?"
They just seem a little shady.
"What did the big flower say to the little flower?"
Hey there, bud.
"Why did the tree go to the dentist?"
To get a root canal.
"What kind of tree fits in your hand?"
A palm tree.
"Why is the ocean so salty?"
Because the land never waves back.
"What did Earth say to the other planets?"
You guys have no life.
"Why did the cloud break up with the fog?"
Because the relationship was too misty.
"How does the moon cut his hair?"
Eclipse it.
"What's a physicist's favorite food?"
Fission chips.
"Why did the photon check no luggage at the airport?"
Because it was traveling light.
"What did the biologist wear on a first date?"
Designer genes.
"Why are chemists excellent for solving problems?"
They have all the solutions.
"I told a chemistry joke."
There was no reaction.
"What do you do with a sick chemist?"
If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.
"Why did the sun go to school?"
To get a little brighter.
"What did one volcano say to the other?"
I lava you.
"Why do plants hate math?"
Because it gives them square roots.
"What did the limestone say to the geologist?"
Don't take me for granite.
"Why can't you trust an atom?"
They make up literally everything.
"How do you organize a space party?"
You planet.
"I'm reading a book about teleportation."
It's bound to take me places.
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?"
Because the 'p' is silent.
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity."
It's impossible to put down.
"Why don't scientists trust atoms?"
Because they make up everything.